New Year, New Something

Hello everyone! I apologize that it has been nearly six months since I last made an entry in this blog. However, what better time to make amends and rededicate myself than at the start of a new year? My goal is to post once a week and give my (maybe 12) dedicated readers something to read and think about. To make up for six months of idleness I will post two entries today because I have two ideas for a New Year post that have nothing to do with each other. So let’s stop delaying and get right down to it.

I do not like new year’s resolutions because I feel like they are done in the wrong way. Ironic for the guy who spent the last paragraph trying to set a resolution, but I do my best to have some specific line-items in place when establishing a new goal for the year.

1. Love Yourself
   So frequently we want to change because we hate things about ourselves. “I hate how fat I have gotten” or “I hate that I don’t do this anymore” The simple fact is that we do not change what we hate, we destroy it. Change and growth come out of love. If we say something like, “I love myself and want to treat myself better through exercise and diet” I believe it becomes easier to stay motivated and see results.

2. Never Say Always
   I usually do not like absolutes as it pertains to goal setting. Words like always, never, none, and all can leave no room for mistakes, and we ALL make mistakes. Get it? Seriously, when I worked in residential treatment I frequently heard sweeping declarations from my students saying they would always or never do something. Most of the time they didn’t hold to their word and it crushed them emotionally, pushing them to give up on whatever they were working on. True some things should be completely cut out of our lives. I also think that while we are working to remove those things it is ok to slip, fall, gather ourselves, and start over.

3. Measure Twice, Cut Once
   In goal-setting, make sure you can measure your progress. Vague promises like “work out more” or “talk nicer” are really hard to tell if you are progressing the way you want to. Instead setting a measurable and time-appropriate goal makes it easier to stay motivated. “I want to go to the gym three times a week” or “I will thank five people every day” allows you to measure how well you are doing. I also like the incremental time periods, this allows the goal to periodically reset. We can have a bad week/day/month and start over next time. Failing is ok, starting over and learning from our mistakes is even better.

4. Give Up
   I do not mean this ironically. If your goal is stressing you out, or proves to be too much it is ok to give up. The main goal is to love yourself and to feel better, so if our goals are doing the opposite why keep going? I will say that it is probably better to reevaluate and change goals before giving up on them completely. Maybe hitting the gym so frequently is causing joint pain? Give up on the gym and go for walks instead. Notice that you are cranky with giving up on caffeine? Set up cheat days or give yourself a daily allowance. Trust me, I know the value of perseverance and dedication. I don’t want to discourage anyone from reaching for their goals, or saying when things get hard that we need to give up. All I mean is that we cannot lose sight of the bigger goal; loving ourselves.

5. You Already Did It
   Lastly, know that even setting a goal shows growth regardless of the outcome. If you only went to the gym for a month, you still gave yourself a month of health and strength. You wanted to read a book a month, but only read five books last year? You still read five books last year. Whatever good you did for yourself is set in stone. It is part of history and cannot be changed. I ran a half-marathon in high school, along with a few friends and their parents. One of the dads did not finish, I think he made it to mile 11 before the course closed and he had to stop. We all felt bad for him until we actually talked to him. He smiled as big and said, “That is the farthest I have ever run in my life.” That man is a prime example of positivity and focusing on the good we have done for ourselves before thinking about our failures. I do believe, years later, he ran that same race and finished.
   

   DISCLAIMER: I am in no way a professional. These thoughts are my opinion and my opinion alone. I believe they work for me, and I hope they will work for you. Feel free to reach out with any thoughts or concerns! Find me @L0stTurkey on twitter, l0stturkey on Instagram, and L0stturkey on Facebook. You can also email me via the contact section on this website. I look forward to hearing from you!